Thursday, December 16, 2010

Twins... hmm.

Recently I've found myself reading up on something that the adoption world calls artificial twinning. Artificial twins are two children biologically unrelated, brought together by adoption, that are 10 months apart in age or less. Unbeknownst to us, we had fallen into this slightly taboo category. When Gabe and I began this adoption, we had planned to adopt a child 2-3 years older than Stevie. That just seemed like an ideal age to add to our family. However on June 25th, our agency sent a profile of a little boy only 9 months older than Stevie, he was instantly our son.

This change in plans began with us putting all of the 5T clothes I had bought him into a bin, to be used years later, and replacing them with his new tiny 18 month clothes. Next putting "roll bars" on the sides of the huge bed in his room that was unfit for a toddler. Later removing all of the Hot Wheels and Legos from his toy baskets and restocking them with big Tonka trucks and stuffed animals. Now we are left trying to figure out why this practice, adopting a child the same age as your biological child, is so frowned upon.

Stevie's adjustment to having a new member of the family in our home is sure to be a challenge. She doesn't always enjoy having visitors in the house, much less a permanent fixture. Her desire to "doe to Afrita and dit her bruder" changes everyday. I'm sure we would be facing similar hurdles if we were bringing home a new born baby that was biologically ours. We obviously have no idea what to expect from Silas. Who knows what he will think of any of us or the life we are going to put him in?

One way or another, on February 13th we will meet our little man for the first time and on the 15th he will officially become our son. We are so excited to finally have an definite timeline! We can't wait to all be together and figure this whole family thing out. We truly believe that love will conquer and that the Lord has not called us to the fire to simply withdraw His hand. He will equip us for this.

We want you all to know what kind of process we may be about to face because we hope that you will continue to support us. We may have many weeks that we don't need to leave our home with Silas, however we will welcome visitors. We may not be able to leave him with anyone else for months, which means we may miss weddings, parties, church, and other important events. Please don't be let that be a sign of our love for you. All of this to say, we may not face any of the afore mentioned issues. Silas may adjust and attach well, Stevie may welcome her new brother with open arms, and our biggest issue, may continue to be picking up our toys when we're done playing with them.

For now we are keeping ourselves busy with travel plans and daydreaming about having our mismatched twins on the same side of the world.